Friday, December 13, 2013


I'd like to make a promise and say I'll write more before the year is out, but knowing myself, I'm just not going to do that.  It won't happen.

To tell you the truth, I'm writing a novel in my head every night before I go to sleep.  I was never a big fiction writer until after college... interesting how that happened.  I miss writing.  I need to sit down and do it more, but I have so much else going on that I feel I can't justify the time, which is sort of silly to me.

Anyway, December is good here because it's not as cold as Utah, but we've still had some snow.  Enough that my generally seasonally-confused self can finally recognize that it's Christmas time and soon it will be January.

Most days, I spend my time with my girls and making various things while they play together and need me occasionally.  I rearrange things, I talk to my dogs, I talk to my girls, I look out the window, I get the mail.  Most days, I don't go anywhere because we're sharing my car right now.  I'm ok with that--my days are pretty simple, and if I said I hope for more, I'd be lying. 

This is the season of my life.  I have such an urge to create, make, do, be more, be better, come up with new things, and sometimes, it hurts.  Most times, it's the norm.  I don't mind because if it means I get to spend time with my sweet and helpful little Ruby and fire-y yet calm little Emmy, I will certainly take it.  They are just my world spinning.

Ruby is killing me with sweetness lately.  She's so helpful at picking up her toys, and every morning, we watch Sesame Street.  She understands that Emmy HAS to sit on my lap because Emmy is a mama's girl more deeply in the mornings, but to compensate, she'll lean her head against my arm.  She's beginning to repeat words I say, like AMEN! or "Emma" for Emmy--she doesn't ever end things in "y. "Puppy" is "puppa" and "daddy" is "dada," etc.  She loves to give kisses and loves to kiss her snuggie (blanket).  She blows kisses and waves to everyone and is VERY social.  Loves her dada and her puppies.

Emmy, on the other hand, is a tough cookie.  She climbs on top of our table on the regular and generally gets into trouble climbing things, trying to climb things, getting into things.  She has this squeak-laugh that just about does me in; it's funny, though, because you can try so hard to get her to laugh and you'll get NOTHING.  You have to earn it with Emerson.  But when she loves you, she LOVES you. She loves talking to plants on our walks and talking to me in jumbled talk, which both she and Ruby do.  I really think they have their own twin language, because it's all nonsense to anyone else who hears it.  Yet, there's a lot of head-nodding that goes on between the two of them when it happens.  Anyway, Emmy is a tender little girl.  She puckers her lips all the time for kisses and says "hiya" regularly, which I LOVE.  She spots and talks about puppies everywhere we go, and she'll say "a puppy?" Over and over again, even when I haven't seen one anywhere.  I'll look and finally spot the dog (a ways away) she's talking about--she's hilarious.

Ruby above, Emmy below.

This year has been the best of the best and the worst of the worst, all rolled into one.  Confusing, hard, soul-searching and heartbreaking... it's been one of those years that's just been everything.  I'm glad to say I lived it. 

1 comment:

Mekenzie @ said...

You are such a good mama. And your girls are so beautiful! You make me excited to just be at home with the babe.