I'm feeling a little weird.
As I was talking to my spouse about it, I asked him what bugs him, and why he doesn't tell me about it very often.
His response: Things don't bug me that often.
I've thought about that a lot today. I said to him, I guess I'm the one making my life hard. I'm the one who bugs me. I've put so much pressure on myself lately, I just can't relax. I am my own biggest problem.
I told him that this is the way I am, what I know. Striving for perfection, making goals and achieving them no matter what, and setting myself up for giant headaches (and stomach aches) when things don't work out exactly or as quickly as I want them to happen.
He said, maybe it's time to learn something new.
I think he's right. I'm trying to make too many things happen, and not only happen, happen perfectly, when I want them to, with no problems. I am really tired--in my head, in my body, everywhere.
I need a break.