And it feels as though everything's gotten much tougher in the last week.
Walking is tough, getting out of bed is tough, rolling over in bed is tough, eating is tough, and I'm getting a lot of acid reflux/heartburn... which is tough. BUT. I'm still doing alright, honestly. In the long scheme of things, this hasn't been the easiest experience, but I want these girls to be healthy and come out just the right amount of cooked. So! We'll see what my doctor says on Friday, which is my next appointment.
I spent the last week reading a book about sleep training twins, and it kind of scared the crap out of me. I often feel that way, that feeling of oh, what have I gotten myself into? I'm scared out of my mind to have them, and then scared out of my mind to be responsible for two entire people. But I just keep reminding myself that I was terrified to get married as well, and I know now what a blessing and fantastic experience that's been, so I just have to roll with the punches. Plus, I can't really change my mind about having them now....
Me at 36 weeks. I'm feeling pretty large. Most of this pregnancy I haven't felt that big, but recently, people have begun to stare at me generally everywhere I go. I actually don't really care that much, but the other day, I was headed into work and I could've sworn I heard two guys talking about me in their parked car, wondering why I don't tip over and laughing about it. I told my housband later and he said, "Who was it? I'll KILL THEM!" which made me laugh.
We ended up going to Sizzler for dinner on our anniversary because I chose, and yes, I am 80 years old. I chose to get salad bar and ended up compiling and eating one of the weirdest dinners known to man, full of random salads, but I got ice cream in the end, which is what I was going for anyway. Ice cream has actually been one of few things I've craved--when I was first pregnant, we went to get Aggie ice cream almost every day for a week.
After dinner, we bought a movie at Walmart, and while in the back of the store, I thought, I'm too tired to walk back to the front. I guess my level of exhaustion has increased, though I feel pretty sedentary and I nap a lot in the morning since I don't go to preschool anymore. That, and my back is starting to hurt more consistently, and my belly feels pretty darn heavy... so, I actually feel 80 years old right now. I also sleep with three pillows under my head to combat acid reflux, one between my knees (it's actually this one, which is a giant C; I put it in between two pillows under my head and the other part between my knees), and two stacked pillows beneath my feet because my left foot, especially, is now swollen all the time.
I swear I'm making this sound worse than it actually is/has been. I promise I'm not suffering horribly and I'm ok. I've read some other twin mom blogs throughout my pregnancy, which scared me pretty badly about what I've had to look forward to throughout this whole experience. But after going through it myself, I think it's more funny than anything else... though I might not be the same afterward, it can't be like this forever, right? And the fact that my left foot swells worst after going to church is actually pretty funny to me, too. Apparently, I'm not supposed to go to church anymore?
SO anyway, we went to Walmart, came home, and watched our movie. It was a low-key anniversary, but I don't mind. Just spending time with my housband is the BEST!
And now I can focus on surviving childbirth. Which also really scares me. Regardless, I'll get there.
Any day now, little ladies.....